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Old 02-20-2020, 06:38 AM   #1
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Update on my Dad

I just realized I never really updated all you prayer warriors on my dad. In a nutshell, here it is:

In a two week period, dad had THREE blood transfusions when his blood counts dropped to the worrisome, critically low levels. A number of tests were run. In this process we learned that while he has had renal cell carcinoma on one of his kidneys for a number of years, which he and mom made the decision when it was discovered to just keep an eye on and not do anything about it, he now has it on BOTH kidneys. Also, he has dementia, which continues to progress, fairly rapidly.

Because being out of his normal environment exacerbated the confusion and frustration levels for him, and because we as a family had made the decision to listen to dad's wishes he had expressed numerous times over the years to not just "be kept alive", the decision was made to take him home on hospice. My brother has become a hero to our family over the last 5 years, as he is the one taking care of dad all of this time. It's never been the easiest thing for him to do. And has gotten progressively worse. But he does it, which is a huge help for my sister and I.

Every time I get to go home, I notice the less than subtle changes in dad. When I arrived home for Christmas, while Dad never called me by name, his face lit up and I heard him saw "There she is!", as he took my hand and kissed it over and over again, not wanting to let go. He was talkative that visit, though little of what he said made sense.

Weather between Branson and Kansas City this winter - coupled with not one but TWO moves - has kept me from getting home as much as I would have liked. When I walked in to the house on Super Bowl weekend, dad was sitting in his wheelchair at the kitchen table, just pushing his food around, and putting his handkerchief in his tea. There was not even a glimmer of recognition in his eyes. In fact, all he did the whole time I was there was sleep. There was one brief moment when I got home from watching the Super Bowl at my sister's house when he offered to share his cupcake with me.

Since I've been back home, my brother says he pretty much just sleeps all day. When they try to get him out of bed, he says it hurts to stand. He no longer uses his walker, and now has a hospital bed to make things easier for both him and my brother.

My prayer for my dad has become a prayer for mercy for him. I know that he has been missing mom over the last nearly 5 years, as well as the rest of his family and loved ones who have gone on before him. And I know he is ready to be with his Lord and Savior...he actually said exactly that during a lucid moment in the hospital. So I pray for mercy, and that he wouldn't be kept waiting much longer for the reunions he craves.

I also pray for my brother, as we are concerned how he will handle things when dad passes. He is not a man of faith, and has a very tender heart. We often get the feeling that he somehow thinks dad's worsening condition is somehow because he's not done things correctly.
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Old 02-20-2020, 06:42 AM   #2
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Old 02-20-2020, 06:54 AM   #3
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So very sorry to hear about your dad. Know this is not an easy time for any of you.

You and your entire family will be in my prayers nightly.

ray ing:

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Old 02-23-2020, 06:24 AM   #4
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Thinking of you. It's a lot to deal with.
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Old 02-23-2020, 01:04 PM   #5
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May the Lord grant your father respite and an easy transition/homecoming. May He grant strength and comfort to your family, especially your brother.
Pain shared is pain diluted by half. Joy shared is joy doubled.


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Old 02-23-2020, 06:09 PM   #6
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Sending hugs and prayers for your family during this difficult time.
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Old 02-24-2020, 04:46 AM   #7
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Sending prayers for your dad and for your family. Watching a loved one slip away is never easy an dementia is especially cruel Sending a hug too
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Old 02-27-2020, 08:28 PM   #8
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Praying that in God’s all-knowing time & wisdom, he will soon bring your father home to Himself. I know this isn’t easy and my heart goes out to you.
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